Darkening of the Light
by Senya Starseeker
Summary: A tribute fic to the character who dies in Order of the Phoenix, SPOILERS for book 5. Remus' POV.


Darkening of the Light  
  
Senya Starseeker  
  
This is a tribute to the character that dies in Order of the Phoenix, obviously there are spoilers so if you have not read the fifth book yet then do not read this fic! This is a songfic to the song "Darkening of the Light" by Concrete Blonde from Remus Lupin's point of view. I do not own Harry Potter, JK Rowling does.  
  
Remus Lupin stirred, he could feel the cool air of the early morning and knew instinctively that the sky outside would be cold and grey, as sombre as his mood. Lupin shifted uneasily under the covers, the empty pit in his stomach was still there, the horrible despairing loss of his best friend, the last of his close friends, in fact. Knowing that he would not be able to fall asleep again Lupin slid out of bed and got dressed. He was still haunted by fleeting images of the black veil rippling out as Sirius was lost in it.  
  
Like a ghost-is the curtain  
In the white light of the morning-  
Dancing in the morning  
Are you there-Are you there?  
  
Lupin moved outside of Grimmauld Palace and paused on the sidewalk where there was a small patch of mostly wilted flowers. The crumbling wilted petals made his spirits sink even lower . . .  
  
And a shadow-like sadness  
Falling all across the garden  
  
Lupin felt the wind stirring around him, blowing through his greying hair and his coat, it felt like it was blowing straight through his soul. Eerily the ruffling pieces of litter scurrying across the London streets at his feet and the wind around him made Lupin feel like he was not quite alone. He looked to his side and saw no one there, but still could not help but wonder . . .  
  
Dancing in the garden  
Are you there-Are you there?  
  
He took a shaky breath and walked down to the end of the street, it seemed as desolate and old as he felt. Lupin could not help playing back memories in his mind of the Four Marauders lazing around in the Gryffindor common room, pulling pranks on the Slythrins, laughing fool-heartily in the face of danger-or detention.  
  
Shine on friend, goodnight  
Why then the darkening of the light  
  
Lupin felt the sting of unfallen tears burning behind his eyes, he could see so clearly James, or Prongs, sitting on the couch in the Gryffindor common room with his girlfriend Lily, their arms hanging loosely around the other; Peter, or Wormtail, sitting on the floor, peering ever so often up from his text book to look up at the group and pop a chocolate frog into his mouth; and finally Padfoot, Sirius Black, slouched lazily over the entirety of the second couch with his bark-like laugh, plotting some next prank on the Slythrins and never knowing that he was going to be framed for the murder of his friends, sent to Azkaban for years, hunted down, and finally killed in battle . . .  
  
Shine on friend, goodnight  
Why then the darkening of the light  
  
Now they were all gone beyond the point of return. Lupin shuddered at the thought that one day they had all been sitting around laughing and joking, and he had told James and Sirius for the hundredth time to do their own homework because they were not copying his, and then giving in and letting them copy it. Lupin could still hear their voices caught up, excited, happy and youthful . . .  
  
And the leaves at my feet  
Whisper sounds so familiar  
Whispers so familiar-  
Are you there? Are you there?  
  
They were all good people, James, Lily, Sirius . . . so why were they all one by one snatched out of his life? Why was he always left alone, his friends gone? And then why after years when he finally had Sirius back did he have to be snatched so cruelly into the hands of death?  
  
Why then the darkening of the light  
  
He could picture Sirius laughing and taunting the Death Eater Bellatrix, then the way his laugh had frozen on his lips, and the way his face looked-shocked and suddenly very afraid-as he fell . . .  
  
Shine on friend, goodnight  
Why then the darkening of the light  
  
Remus Lupin had long since stopped paying attention to where his feet were leading him, he had no idea how many blocks he walked, or how many buses he took, but somehow he found himself crossing the Hogwarts school grounds, and his destination appeared to be-of course-the Shrieking Shack.  
  
Lupin sat alone in the shack, his knees pulled up to his chest, he had no idea how long he stayed that way, but there was a small hole in part of the ceiling through which he watched the sun rise and the sky darken into the night . . . many, many times . . .  
  
Where the clouds pull apart  
And the moon changes faces  
  
Lupin did not know why exactly he found comfort in the old, crumbling building. It was familiar, there were plenty of memories . . . if the Marauders ever haunted any place, this would be it. Lupin forced a weak smile, knowing that none of his friends would be coming back as ghosts, but still, in the old shack he felt comforted by their presence . . . somehow . . .  
  
In the quiet secret places  
Are you there? Are you there?  
  
". . . Padfoot?" 


End file.
